The Soundtrack of My Mind

„I said it’s enough, I begged and I ran in circles, I climbed to the sun and fell in a concrete jungle”.

The song “concrete jungle” by the band “Bad omens” awakens everything in me, from desperation to deep satisfaction. But mainly, and that is the most important point, I feel understood. On a soul-level.

One could say it’s just art or it’s just a song, as if art weren’t enough- but even then, it’s so much more. It’s life. Let me tell you why.

The slow sweet thoughtful begin of the soft-sung melody, taking its time to wallow and explain its sorrow before taking on another verse. The sorrow is drawn picturesquely through words: make-up that melts with bruises underneath, questioning whether you recognize yourself.

It’s an introspective question of what makes a human be himself. Is it the looks, the outside world, the status? Is it what other people think of you? Does it make you yourself when others tell you who you are? Can you not know who you are without looking through the reflection in the eyes of others? What makes up free will? Is it ever pleasing others that we choose, altruistically yet hedonistically? Is that what we are made for? A society with rules and following and serving- also, maybe mainly, because we don’t know who we are without it?

The music takes on a climb: It soars towards the sun- and falls into the “concrete jungle” symbolizing civilization with all restrictions including its ugliness: “The sirens pass and harmonize, fires starting every day and night, burn around us while we’re trapped inside”.

“Concrete jungle” by Bob Marley and the Wailers, a song with the same title, which is older, conveyes a similar point. Some of its lyrics being “Where is love to be found? Won’t someone tell me, ‘cause life must be somewhere to be found”. It seems there is an agreement between the two songs of dissatisfaction about the urban surroundings and its entailing difficulties is a theme.

After the devastating outlook on the present, the thoughts of the melody’s protagonist travel into thoughts of freedom: “a world where you don’t have to hide, you don’t have to live in a disguise”. That’s the dream.

The friendly wailing of “I said its enough” signifies a shift in mentality before the anger exudes through the singer becoming a shouter. The lyrics join the change and become very direct and desperately delusional: “And I’m the f***ing king”. He wants things money can’t buy, nobody can kill him because he can’t die. This part ends with another “I said its enough” displaying the angry yet straight-forward intent of things needing to change.

Ending with “And I’m the f***ing king” the protagonist sheds tears internally, speaking in pictures: without letting his make-up fade yet having decided on the life he wants to live without make-up. He exclaims his frustration, anger and the listener will not know from this song alone whether he manages to change anything of the system affecting him or maybe even others. Yet, there will always be an angry frustrated grain of hope giving strength to all who feel trapped, fallen and defeated. Maybe the concrete jungle will be awakened by rays of sunlight in the mornings and tears will be able to be shed, no matter how many bruises will come to the surface and how much still has to heal. Maybe, just maybe, there’s hope for a better future.